I have dishwasher issues. I mean, don’t look a gift horse in the mouth and all that, but every time my mom visits, she does dishes, but it’s never helpful because I end up doing them over again, the right way. I mean, for one, she’ll emtpy/fill the dishwasher when she wakes up, which is often sometime between 5 & 6 am. I remember one morning, dave and I listening to her slam dishes into our (steel, don’t forget) cabinets and Dave saying, in that dry way of his, "I didn’t think we had that many dishes." She’s just loud, I’ve vented about that before, but anyway. I have, for YEARS told her to not TOUCH my dishwasher, because I have a list of rules about it. For one, the only thing in the dishwasher is tableware. Pots, pans, wooden spoons, spatulas, etc… do not go in the dishwasher. The Good Knives never do, especially not blade up, but both dave and I have been bitten by that particular bug before.

So, to illustrate my insanity point, I took pictures.

My mom’s version. No attention to space usage, unless "expose as much surface area to lower jets as possible.

Bottom rack: dishes are all facing out, there’s a BOWL, big plates crammed into small plate spaces.  It’s important to note that at this point, my mom will start harping on me to run the dishwasher, because "it’s full."

And now, the RIGHT WAY:

Drinking vessels line the sides, with the handles turned to allow maximum capacity. Vessels are tucked between the outer prongs and the edge, not dangling over/off of them. The bowl-braid allows for maximum bowls, but allows water and detergent to still flow freely. There is a rare, but allowable, placement of drinking vessels at the back of the rack.

Bottom rack: Plates face in, towards the jets. NO BOWLS. little plates in the little slots. I didn’t run it at this time, because the back had to be filled. I will run metal mixing bowls and glass pie plates/casserole dishes when there’s a gap like that.

Yes. I am neurotic. Interview with HR at 9. Good vibes, please.