It’s interesting, how I don’t find myself fitting into any one category when it comes toparenting.  I mean, I do a little of everything, and as such, don’t really fit into any one cubby, I think.  I’m too crunchy for ‘mainstream’ folks, and I’m too mainstream for crunchy folks. It’s odd.

I’ll break it down:

We are cosleeping– for now.  it works for us right now, and there are plenty of benefits, but some drawbacks too, and not just the well-meaning comments from people who need to ask "WHERE is the baby sleeping?" (Because really, as long as the answer isn’t "At YOUR HOUSE" wtf does it matter? That’s just looking to make a judgment in one direction or another…) The bassinet has never been a place for Ingrid to hang out in, for longer than it takes for me to pee, but she WILL chill in her crib for a while. I don’t know if it’s because the bassinet has closed sides, or feels more confining, or what, but she doesn’t take to it at all.  This week, I’ve been putting her in her crib while I shower, after spending the first several weeks using the bouncy seat on the bathroom floor for that purpose.  She has her tinylove mobile, which she likes, now that she can see it, and she is usually content while Ishower, and if she ISN’T, I can hear her letting me know that over the sound of the mobile and the shower. It’s a small house.  And when that happens, I’m okay with letting her cry for a bit, while I finish my shower or whatever, and maybe that’s CIO, but I don’t think so, since she never cries unattended for more than 5 minutes, I’d wager.

But while I do like having her with me, I also miss being able to sleep in any position other than on my left side.  We have been getting pretty good at side-lying nursing, which makes her night wakeup easier, but I also miss snuggling up to Dave in the mornings, which isn’t a real possibility in our bed, because Ingrid is in the middle, and our bed is really high off the ground (more than regular height) and I don’t want her on the outside.  The size ofour bed is another reason I’d like to transition her to the crib, in some fashion, eventually. Which is very noncommittal, eh?  But that’s how I am with this whole thing, I said it before, and I’llsay it again, I’m going on instinct. Not any specific brand of parenting, but just "this feels right, now" parenting.

ANother hybrid-mama thing is that I love babywearing, but oh my god, I also love our stroller. Can you imagine!  I wear her exclusively when we go out to stores or anything, but we use the stroller for neighborhood walks, because it gets muggy in Maine, dontcha know.  (I did wear her ONCE on an unusually cool day several weeks ago…)  The stroller has never been in the car, the carseat has rarely been out of the car (I popped out the baby bucket 3 times so far — the first was thedisastrous first trip out, when I realized i was a slingmama at heart, the second was when i went to Andy’s mom’s to swim, and really, only because it has a sunshade on it, and we’d be outside, and the last was yesterday, when I took her to my 6w postpartum checkup, and needed a place to hold her while I was in the stirrups.) and in all of those cases, if I DIDN’Thave a baby bucket seat, I could’ve used the stroller. In hindsight, Iwould’ve skipped the bucket and gone straight tothe Decathlon, which I sat her in this morning(it’s in her room) and so so so wish I couldput it in my car RIGHT NOW, but I don’t want to hurt Dave’s feelings, since he spent SO much time getting the bucket installed.

And as much as I dig slings, I do adore the swing & bouncy seat, as well. It’s a safe place to put her while I do dishes or go to thebathroom, or whatever, and she seems to dig those tools as well. SHe likes the fishie mobile, she likes the buzzy bouncy seat, so, it works for us.  I don’t think she’s going to be a lesser person because she’s been put in either.

We cloth diaper, but at about 80% of the time. She sleeps in disposables, and I keep dispos in my diaper bag, and often if we’re going out for a while, I’ll put her in a dispo. We use the White Cloud dispos, which are cheap and hypoallergenic, but require a trip to WalMart. Whatever, it works for us, you know?  (I still hate WM, but I can’t afford 7th Gen paper diapers, and also, I just made a wrapfrom cheapass WM fabric, so I can still hang on to my principles. Ha! 😀 )

The one thing I don’t REALLY budge on is breastfeeding, as that is, and has been, my number one priority going into this. Of course, I pump and Dave gives hera bottle every few days, because she needs to be able to take a bottle when I’mworking, which brings me to my NEXT "I don’t fit anywhere" thing, in that I have a JOB INTERVIEW in two days. But it’s not a job related to my, you know, ADVANCED DEGREE, so I’m letting down the mainstreamers there by applying for work I’m overqualified to do, but means no outside childcare needs/expense — and I let down the crunchies by applying for work at all.

In the end though, it sort of speaks to one of the qualities I hope Ingrid gets, which is to be flexible. If I hadn’t been flexible going into pregnancy and birth, I would probably be super disappointed right now.  Flexibility is a great thing — I think it’s great that Ingrid likes the sling AND the stroller. I think it’s great that she can nurse from Mama and take a bottle from Daddy. I think it’s great that she can see that education in itself is valuable, and it doesn’t need an immediate financial payout. You know?

So, for now, we’re good. And flexible. And if you ask Ingrid right now, HUNGRY.