Dave has been working on figuring out his leave for when the baby comes, and asked HR, who gave him the options, and then he figured he’d ask a coworker whose wife had a baby earlier in the year to see what he thought, if taking all of the 2 weeks at once was a good plan, or to breakit up in some way. He just called with the results of his informal survey, and the coworker said absolutely, full 2 weeks. Then said "Why, is someone you know having a baby?" Ha! This guy doesn’t work in creative, but he and Dave share DVDs and such, and they were both surprised that the news hadn’t shot through the gossip chain at work. Anyway, it was funny. The other thing the guy said was that they didn’t take the childbirth classes at the hospital, and everything worked out fine anyway.
So, now I have questions! And I know plenty of mamas cruise through here, whose opinions I totally respect, and maybe you could help a girl out here.
Childbirth education: We don’t have much offered here, except for the hospital classes, that include one for breastfeeding and one for newborn care, and a hospital tour and such. Our insurance will cover it, so it’s not a financial issue. As far as the information, I think we could pretty much self-educate okay, since that’s what we do. I have already ordered Sears’ Birth Book, and have The Birth Partner on my to-buy list.
So, knowing that it would be essentially free, would you do a CBE class? And if so, when? (I know of all those cool alternative earthmama classes, like Birthing From Within, or Bradley, but we’re too rural for that.)
Pediatrician choosing: When did you do this? And how did you do it? There’s a few practices in town for pediatrics, and I think I do want to go that route. We have a family practice for our PCPs, but I’ve been really discouraged by how that works, and while I like the concept of family practice, I’ve always felt uncomfortable in the waiting room when a new baby is there for a well-baby visit, I assume, and some old man is coughing up phlegm in the next seat over. What makes a good peds practice?
Also, is it weird to be excited to get my FA funding because THEN I can order the cloth diapers? Yeah? I thought so.
CBE: If it’s free, then do it. Maybe not for you, but for Dave. Seriously- I don’t think sweets had any concept of childbirth before our classes, even though he had done a lot of reading. There’s something about being in a room with a lot of other nervous, expecting parents that helps drive the message home that this is an important and difficult time for the mom. Also, we met our best parenting friends at our childbirth class and we NEVER would have met them otherwise. Even though I wasn’t a huge fan of the class or the teacher, the end results were much more important and intangible than I might have guessed before the fact. Plus, even though the class isn’t granola crunchy, it will help you make better decisions when the time comes because you will know all the options. And I find the Sears books great but very unbalanced, so it’s good to get a different perspective. Also- there are some great bradley books out there for more self-teaching. We liked Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon, and there’s one by Penny Simkin called the Birth Partner that also comes highly recommended.
Pediatrician: We just went with the person who was assigned us by the university health plan. I definitely like the practice though- it’s all peds, with a variety of MDs and NPs delivering care. Definitely find a practice with an NP if you can- they are amazing sources of information and they generally have more time to spend with you. Even if your primary clinician is an MD, there will be times when the MD isn’t available and you’ll see the NP instead.
And whatever you do, just don’t sit next to the coughing person in the waiting room. Silly greschya.
The hospital O was born at didn’t offer any classes until the baby was born. Which makes a lot of sense for the baby care and breastfeeding classes. Much easier learning those things with an actual baby. No extra cost.
Childbirth class, we had the NP from my doc’s office come over and talk to us about it all. Honestly, it wasn’t helpful for J and I. Although the video, yes there wa a video, was the mose helpful for J. But you don’t need a class for that I’m sure.
As for finding a pediatrician, I asked two moms that I know but who are from totally different parts of my life and have no knowledge of each other, and they recommended the same doctor. That was enough for me, especially after reading great things about him elsewhere. And we now love him. We always make O’s appointments for 6pm, that way we’re essentially the only people there and we don’t have to wait. Thereby avoiding the snot-filled kids trying to share toys and kiss O.
CBE: Sure, take the class, especially if it’s free. Since it’s offered by your hospital, you’ll learn about different policies and practices that your hospital has. Another nice benefit is that you might make a friend, like the person above said…the other people in the class will be having babies when you are and you might find someone like-minded or just someone to meet for a walk with the babies once in a while. We didn’t make a close friend from our class, but it was still nice to get to know others who were expecting babies around when we were. Probably take the class during your 7th or 8th month of pregnancy. Don’t procrastinate too much…We missed the last session of our 6 session class because Sadie was born that morning!
You should probably investigate lactation consultants in your area. There were 2 full time at the hospital when Sadie was born and they were super helpful. If you have good access to an LC, I don’t think a breastfeeding group class is really necessary.
Pediatrician: We called the pediatric group that we liked and asked which doctors in the group were taking new patients. They mentioned 2 doctors and we set up informational meetings with both of them. We ended up liking the first one we met so much that we didn’t do the 2nd interview. We really like her and we’ve also seen other members of the group for random things and everyone has been very nice. The practice has 2 waiting rooms, Well Child and Sick Child, which I appreciate. There is also a pharmacy in the building. Very convenient.
CBE: If it’s free and you’re available I’d go along, but I probably wouldn’t go out of your way to do it. If it is anything like mine, you’ll have read enough that anything they tell you, you will already know and you could probably teach them a thing or two. I actually missed the childbirth class (ours was 6 sessions covering labour, bf, family planning + labour ward tour) but I doubt I missed anything and I did OK. The main reason I went to any of the classes was to meet other couples.
As for timing I did the classes fairly early, around 5-6 months. It was probably too early because at that stage I wasn’t really ready for thinking too seriously about how the pregnancy was going to end. Month 7-8 sounds better.
Ditto everyone else. Our hospital CBE class was taught by a midwife even though the actual hospital doesn’t allow midwives. I found it really helpful, more so than I initially thought. I would definately call to reserve a spot right a way for the class that is in your 7-8th month. Most of the classes were already closed by the time I called. I also liked the BF class. We watched a video that I thought was great because most people don’t feel comfortable gawking at a woman breastfeeding under normal circumstances. (I also asked a close friend to show me with her newborn a few times.) Your library may have videos too.
On the ped front, I asked my OB and she recommended her, but I can’t stand her. I know about 8 women who have gone to her once and switched. The location is really convienent, she returns my calls very quickly, and I am hopefully moving soon, so I still go to her. She basically administers the shots, but Dr Sears is who I turn to with most questions and parenting matters.
CBE: As above. We didn’t go for any classes, but I read a ton online and books and stuff and was really prepared. My labour and delivery went exactly the way I wanted, too, so I guess I was really lucky. The only thing I missed by not taking the class or going on a tour of the ward was that I wasn’t sure of the policies of the hospital. In the end, it wasn’t an issue because everything went so quick (I arrived at 8cm).
As for the doctor. We go to a family doctor who also sees children when there are issues. Otherwise, well baby checkups are done at the local clinic – that’s the system here in Israel. A lot of people recommended the doctor, and we go to him ourselves and are really happy with how thorough and professional he is. You just have to find someone who is on your wavelength… If you have any local friends, ask them for advice and direction. Good luck.
We did a childbirth class around 6 months. It was more informative for Adam I think, who, even though he’d done research and supposedly been listening to me tell him stuff (though I suspect he was hearing more of a “eeeeeeeeeeeeeee” sound), seemed to find the information helpful. It was good to hear perspectives from a couple of different labor room nurses (who taught the course) and who didn’t always agree with each other… Goes to show the experience is different for everyone.
We started looking for Pediatricians around 6 1/2-7 months I think 9though damn, it’s been a while and my memory is fading fast!). We jut asked around for recommendations then choose which of those were on our insurance. We choose the person we did based mainly on rapport and because he had very satisfactory answers to whatever questions I had… Though the way that office worked, they did group interviews on certain mornings for all soon-to-be parents, so it often actually ME asking the questions. I kiss that guy a lot. Our new pediatrician is no where near as great as he was.
CBE: Same as everyone else. If it’s free, why not?
Pediatrician: I looked at a long list provided by my OB practice, and cross-referenced with our insurance. Then I looked at the ones who had privileges at the hospital I used. Then I started calling them to set up interviews or group interviews to meet a doc. A few I eliminated, even though they came highly recommended, because 1) I hated the phone prompts I had to listen to in order to get a person, 2) the staff I spoke to was rude or clueless or otherwise not-together. I ended up with a doc I absolutely love, in a practice that (it turns out) is highly regarded by many folks, and it’s a well-run, very organized, great practice. I tend not to get a lot of recommendations before the fact, because even though I respect a lot of other new parents and their opinions, I trust my gut a lot more.
Ha! I worte “I kiss that guy a lot” about our old pediatrician! I mean, he was alright, but no one I was into kissing. I meant “MISS.”