I’m a pretty lucid dreamer.  I dream in color, I can always remember tiny details of dreams, and I’m always an active participant.  So far, I’ve had two pregnancy dreams, both of which, in the end, make me roll my eyes at how I am, EVEN IN MY DREAMS.

Dream #1, Saturday Night:

The baby is home, I’ve had it and I need to feed it. I give it a bottle, and then think "Oh, wait, I wanted to breastfeed!"and simultaneously realizing the bottle is empty.  I start to look for my boob, and can’t find it. Hmm.  When I DO find it, I pull it out, and my nipple is a firehose, and completely drenches my living room. Furniture, woodstove, EVERYWHERE.  And the baby has still not eaten, so I am panicking that I am ALREADY fucking everything up.

When I woke up, I actually had a great sense of relief: I had a pregnancy dream! and I shared that sentiment with Dave, and Jeanne, and other friends, and they were very patient in that "Yeah, whatever, a positive HPT and no period and sore nips and fatigue aren’t good enough to convince you it’s real, but a crazy dream about your tits is." I know. Shut up.

SO THEN.

Dream #2, Sunday Night:

I dream that I have a dream that I think the heartbeat sounds slow at the first ultrasound.  I’m devastated, and sad, and worried, until I realize (in the dream) that it was just a dream (within a dream) and that I’m only dreaming about bad stuff because I’m worried about bad stuff, and because I was so excited to have the first dream, and the baby is fine, and I really need to chill out, because I haven’t had my period, I AM having symptoms, and everything is fine.

AND THEN I WAKE UP FOR REAL.  (I’m just capping that so that you can understand that all of the above? was a dream.  Like in infinity mirror dream, but all of it, IN MY SLEEP.  See,I know I’m a weirdo.