This. Right Here.  I got this link from a listserv I’m on for my grad class.  I just spent 54 minutes listening to the program, and just  . . . wow.  If ever I felt vindicated in thinking about packing it in, teaching-wise, it was listening to that program.

The school that they talk about is one that we watched videos of in methods classes.  They were held up, even in MAINE, as being the way things should be.  But bureaucracy has gutted even that school.

So many of the things that that school did are what we do in my program.  We are two teachers in a school, and to hear that not even an entire SCHOOl’s worth of teachers can fight the battle of doing what’s best for kids, and win, well, that’s so fucking depressing.

It was interesting to hear LaLuz in 1994 talking about how she ran her classroom, how she taught, how she believed kids could learn best.  Ira Glass calls her the best teacher he’d ever seen.  I don’t pretend to imagine I’m the best teacher in the world, but to find that I share the same values and philosophies of a teacher like LaLuz, even to the point of calling kids "darlin," was interesting.  Imagine if I had the freedoms that La Luz did in 1994! Imagine the impact I could have, the teacher I could be! How much I could enjoy teaching!  But I’m in my second year, not my 14th, and feeling like LaLuz. 

I wish there were transcripts available, but there aren’t.  To paraphrase, one of my favorite quotes was about teachers being "expected to be professional and make the best decisions, and then being considered workers just following orders."  I feel like a worker following orders, and that’s not why I became a teacher.  That’s the key, right there.

So, I feel so much more at ease with my discomfort over the direction my school — and most of education in general — is taking (dismantling my program, assessing students in opposition with the curriculum we’re to follow, making everything ‘uniform’ for ease of administration, not doing what has been PROVEN to be best for kids, etc,  etc.)

It’s a long listen, but it’s a good one if you have the time.  And, at the end, you’ll have a much better understanding of how I feel about my profession right now.