One of my coworkers accused me of being ‘too loyal’ the other day.  "You have sick days, WHY are you not taking them? You won’t get paid for them? Who takes a half-day for a doctor appointment to check on the status of their MISCARRIAGE?"  And, I didn’t have a good answer. I don’t know. Because it’s who I am?

I did investigate, and found out that I had 6.5 days left of sick time.  And then yesterday, I thought I was going to die.  Okay, not DIE, but I felt like crap.  I drove to work woozy and with the seat-heaters on to act like a heating pad, and when I got to school, even the crabby secretary in charge of scheduling subs said "You look awful! GO HOME!"  Two other teachers agreed with her, and I was trying to be all strong and all, and the secretary would have none of it, so a sub was called in and I was gone by 8:45.

Which is a good thing, I came home, passed a LOT of blood and stuff, and then fell asleep on the couch for more than three HOURS. Unheard of for me.  Dave even came home, made lunch, ate it whilst sitting at my feet on the couch and watching television, and I never even moved. "You were out COLD."  He was here for an HOUR! And I had no clue.

I had my beta in the afternoon, where I’m hoping for a negative result (so odd, to want a negative pregnancy test after a year) that will indicate I’m on track for a totally natural miscarriage. (I’ve mentioned this to a few people, but every time I say miscarriage, I want to follow it with an indignant "of JUSTICE!" I don’t know why.) Today, I’m supposed to have an appointment with the OB, it was scheduled for 12:30 but they just called and asked if I could come in tomorrow at 10:30, but I don’t want to miss school tomorrow, too, so they think they can get me in at 4.

Saturday, I’m going to Portland for a rockin’ party at El Chuck E. Cheese for the almost-5 Liam.  Watch out Ball Pit, here I come!  Sunday, I shift gears to shoot a graduation in central Maine, and then Monday I have a personal day.

The next few weeks, I don’t have a full five day week at all.  Counting down the last few weeks of school:
Week 4: Monday off, all day field trip on Friday = 3 school days
Week 3: Monday off, 2 day overnight 8th grad field trip Thursday/Friday = 2 school days
Week 2: Wednesday off, = 4 school days
Week 1: 8th graders out on Monday for good, graduation on Tuesday, 7th grade all day field trip on Wednesday, last day of school= 1/2 day on Friday = 3.5 school days, but with half the kids, since my 8th graders will be gone.

So, that’s 12.5 school days. I haven’t even counted the band concert (which will take an afternoon) or the awards assembly (which will take a morning) or the French spelling bee (which will take a morning) or all of the ‘marching practice’ the 8th graders have to do. So really, like, ten days of academic instruction. But the last ten days of academic instruction of the school year are well, you know. You remember.  And in all of that, I still have four days of sick time that I may or may not need, depending on the progression of the miscarriage…. of JUSTICE!

The end is near. I can’t wait for summer vacation.