My 82 year old grandmother, on hearing that my sister and her boyfriend bought furniture, including a hot tub and king size bed: "Ohh, I see, they’re getting their sex toys first, huh?"

My sister, upon hearing that that was said about her: "Shut UP! EWW!"

Me, on hearing that my sister’s new street names is Beaver Canyon Drive: "BWAHAHAHAHAH!  Why not just call it Vulva Pussy Avenue?"