3 dumb things

1.  In ordering a wedding present for our friends’ wedding next month, I’ve been trying to find out the bride’s last name. It’s a color name, and I wasn’t sure if it had an E at the end or not, and I called Dave to ask Matt, but he wasn’t there, and I started to google it, until I realized I was — and had been — looking at TWO of their registries. No E.

2.  I have a mix CD that I listen to a lot in the car, and it has La Vie Boheme, from RENT, on it, and I thought originally that the line was "To Gouda, to Buddha, To Roto-Rootah" and I didn’t quite get why Roto-Rooter was part of the bohemian lifestyle, or why it was pronounced with a Boston or Maine accent… until I really listened and realized "OH! PABLO NERUDA! OF COURSE!" And apparently, it’s To Uta, not Gouda. Gouda makes more sense than Roto-Rootah, though.

3. After HOW MANY years? I just realized that one of my NYC LJ friends username is an anagram of her real name. I always wondered what it meant, and just kind of imagined that it was some sort of polish casserole. I have no idea why, but I can hear someone saying, "oh, I’ll bring the Rh——–sko if you bring the sausage!"

EDITED 7/17/07 — in the Import, the comments got separated from the post, and they were as follows:

AHH!! I didn’t realize that either!

I didn’t, either!  All this time I thought it was something in Italian, or Polish, or…

(The name anagram, I mean.)

augh!  it IS!  I always thought like, some kind of rhubarb dish.

Ingrid’s
new lovey is similar to two that O has. She loves them and the fact
that we only let her have them in bed and in the car sometimes proves
to be difficult. She sometimes squeal "Taggies!" when it’s time for bed.

HAaahahaHaaahaha!

Yes, yes indeed it is!

I f*cking love it…

I didn’t get that either!  doh!

Cell Phone

Grocery shopping at Hannaford yesterday, a woman waiting in line (IN LINE, that’s important) answered her cell phone.  Now, I don’t know if it was on the walkie-talkie setting, or just high volume, or if the person calling was just a loud person, but she was. LOUD. So loud my first thought was "geez, hope she doesn’t say something embarrassing . . ."

Friend on Phone (FOP): HEY! DID YOU FORGET SOMETHING AT MY HOUSE?

StoreLady(SL): No, I don’t think so, why?

FOP: ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN’T LEAVE SOMETHING IN MY BATHROOM?

SL:  Uhhhhhhh

FOP: YOU SHIT IN MY BATHROOM AND DIDN’T FLUSH! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

OH. MY. GOD. You have to understand, by the time I heard the punchline, I was halfway down the aisle that runs perpendicular to the fish cases. I was LIGHT YEARS away, and heard. every. word.  And the lady was IN LINE. IN LINE!!! So you know everyone there heard, there would be NO way around it. I was quivering in horror by the pickles, just out of sympathetic mortification on behalf of the lady who just wanted to get some haddock. Seriously. This is why my golden rule of cell phones is "just because it’s ringing, doesn’t mean you have to answer it." Goddamn.

Flu tips! Ha!

From this article on MSN, the tips at the end are as follows:

Finally, a few ideas you can use and share in the workplace to help stop the spread of flu germs:

  • If you know you’re sick with the flu, stay home.
  • Get a flu shot, which not only protects you but helps prevent contagion.
  • Within a day of becoming ill, ask your doctor about antiviral medications, which can shorten the episode and contain the virus.
  • Be especially cautious between late December and early March, the peak of flu season.
  • Sneeze or cough into your elbow, not into your hands.
  • Clean phones, doorknobs and desktops with alcohol swabs.
  • Throw used tissues away!
  • Wash your hands and face often with hot, soapy water.
  • During flu season, never let anyone lick your keyboard.

Seriously. Is that a joke that slipped through??

Sneakers vs Fishnets

Last night was parent night, when the kids display their last project for their families.  At one point, two of my favorite kids  (geekboy and gothboy) were talking to the new goth girl.  Goth girl was wearing chucks, fishnet stockings, a short skirt, and a tight shirt.  (She and one of the goth boy are hugely crushing on each other.  Which I totally called within the girl’s first 10 minutes at school; she arrived and had to go to Art, and the geek/goth boy was late for class, so i said "Hey, can you show her to the Art room?" and after they left I turned to an ed tech and said "and try not to fall in love on the way there.") 

ANYWAY.

One of my kids has a baby brother who turns one next month, and has recently started walking.  His mom set him down, and he saw those fishnet stockings, and bolted for them.  He reached out and touched goth girl’s leg before mom got to him, and all the adults chuckled.  Another parent said "Boy, he saw something that interested him!" and  geek boy looked goth girl up and down, shrugged, and said "I don’t see what’s so interesting about sneakers."

I love these kids.

Neighbor Kids

There are two little boys that live across the street.  They are the only kids on the street, and they are always playing outside. They have a trampoline, and in the summer, a pool, but most noticeably, they have bicycles.  They ride up and down, all year round.  They are probably 6 and 7, definitely no older than 8, and the younger one has a thing for Dave.  He talks to him all the time, and Dave hasa never really interacted with small kids, so he never knows what to say, but he does his best.  Last night, when Dave got home, the kid was waiting.

"I bet my bike is faster than your car!"  (Remember, Dave’s car is an Impreza RS 2.5, "Like the WRX but with a bigger engine.")  "I bet I could beat you in a race!"

Dave just sort of agreed, and then the kid said "Subarus are the safest kinda car!" and Dave said "That’s why we have two!" and then came inside.

We went out for pizza later, and came back with our pizza and a new RC car for Dave.  The kid was waiting for us.

"What are you doin?"
"Getting supper," Dave said. (The kid has ZERO interest in me, by the way, I’m just a girl with a station wagon.)
"I’m just pickin’ my wedgie! My bike seat is HARD ROCK. My mom is gonna get me a new seat.  Do you have a bike?"

Dave shoots a look at me and whispers, "Don’t let him see the car!" so I grab it up and head in, and Dave gets the pizza.

"Good luck with your wedgie!"

This morning, drinking coffee, we lok out the window, and there he is, riding up the street, stopping at our driveway, looking around, getting off his bike and messing with the pedals, looking at our house and then riding back down towards his house. Over and over and over.

Now, it could be that his mom has said "Don’t go past the house with the fence," but I think the kid is just wishing Dave ould come out and play.

I told Amy about it and she said "he probably SENSES that Dave should be a dad, and is just giving him some practice."  Aww.

Either way, it’s pretty cute.  I need to learn the kids name.

In other news, CD37, nothing showing but a dream that I had a gushing period and was sad.  I’ve had several dreams of getting my period this month, so maybe that’s why I’m so ‘whatever’ about the whole deal this month.  I was thinking about testing tomorrow, but I think I’ll wait until I’m late to test. If I have to call in to deal with the emotions, I have to call in.  I have 20 sick days or so left, so whatever. (Teachers get lots of sick days because it is our number one workplace hazard, germs fly in schools.  We get 15 a year, and can roll them over to the next year.)

I also sent out my app for a scholarship of unknown value.  I feel like a good candidate, since it’s for graduates of Wa. County schools, of which there are 8, and WaCo is the least educated and least populated and most poor county in the state.  Plus, I had some kickass help from PJ & Hermia to make it just right.  So, cross your fingers on that one, okay?

Heh, yeah.

I told the kids today, and, predictably, they were dumbfounded. And a little pissed.  The best comment came from one of my favorites, a kid who is street smart out of necessity, but really, really bright.  He asked what I was going to do next year, so I talked about IT and grad school, and he thought a minute and said:

"So, basically, you’re going to ened up making like, three times as much money, and then come back and say ‘Take THAT, [schoolname]!" 

That’s the plan, I guess. 🙂

Holiday Party

Salesguy to table: Anyone else have a high-definition tv?
Cop, husband of overprocessed salesgirl:  Haha!, no, my wife is high definition enough for me!
Overprocessed salesgirl to cop husband, quietly: No, honey, I’m high maintenance, not high definition.
Me: [quietly kicking Dave under the table.]

*DAVE your eye’s only!!* Mrs. S no lookin!

[and on the inside — as always, names are changed, and SIC]

*DAVE*

Please come to the dance because we are all eager to meet you and Mrs. S******* will be lonley because she will have no one to dance with except me and Kaitlin.
Please, Please, Please come to the dance, because Mrs. S******* said you have never been to a dance and we want our dance to be your first.  If you dont we will be very dissapointed!

                                                            (heart)    Alicia & Kaitlin

Seriously. My kids rock.  Of course, my shy, but loving and thoughtful, husband is freaking out, because he would rather NOT chaperone a dance for middle schoolers, but he doesn’t want to let them down because they took the time to write him a personal NOTE and fold it all football style and made me PROMISE to give it to him without reading it first.

I think we might arrange a compromise of "he drops me off and picks me up and comes inside for the last 15 minutes or so of the shindig" and my kids "get to meet Mrs. S’ husband."

On a similar note, it was 4 years ago today that I met my husband in the brass monkey aisle of Marden’s.   

Life is good.